alienated nostalgia !

Its Jan 05th,08...one of those signatured grey days of winters, when every things seems to be dull, causing boredom... and you wish there would be one sun beam and everything will shine... these grey days always leave a great impact on me... sitting in office right now, but whenever i observe these hazy days every year in winters, all my senses and my passions, my mind and my whole body seems to be dragged and locked up in a kind of strange shell.... i go deep down in the memory lane yet i think of nothing... this grey takes me to all those things i havent done, to all those people i have never met and to all those places where i have never been...... !!! life has never been easy or smooth for me, but i am a sort of person who never regretted anything... i have been through a lot and still have the courage to face more...but there is certainly a wistful desire, a sentimental yearning.. to reach out to something or someone which is always there in my imagination, but my senses have never been able to give that particular feeling a shape or body... !!! i dont know what i want but one thing i know is that this desire is pretty intense !